Have you ever lost touch with a good friend? We all ahve at one time or another. This is my story…
A few years ago an old friend of mine returned to my life. We embraced. We laughed and eventually we cried. And in the time since our reunion we have had great days, exciting days, sad days and many disagreements but this time around we agreed to be honest, respect each other’s individuality and have healthier communication when we disagree. My life is so much better for it. I am so grateful that we are good friends again.
You may ask the questions, what happened, why did you lose touch, who’s fault was it and what led to the reunion? All great questions, however in retrospsect I’m not sure I have an answer that makes sense.
When I reflect, I’m sure there was “BIG” event that pushed us apart, but the worst part is I don’t remember such an event. It’s almost like I simply stopped putting effort in the relationship. I took it for granted. I did not appreciate how good I felt when we were together. I think my friend may have insulted me, ignored me or found other friends. I became jealous, hurt, angry and eventually resentful. I brooded. I felt as though I deserved an apology. I did not deserve to be treated that way. Soon, I wanted nothing to do with my ‘best friend”. We drifted apart and I found other friends. But none really compared. Why didn’t I recognize it? Why didn’t my friend call me? Why was it my responsibility to call?
Then one day, someone reminded me how much nicer, more relaxed and more friendly I was when my friend was in my life. It took a lot of soul searching, but I agreed, so I made a conscious decision take the initiative and rekindle and maybe repair our relationship. I made a conscious decision to let go of the past events because they were not helping me, they were simply a burden I no longer wanted to bare. I also decided not to create expectations about where the relationship would lead. I simply wanted to try and reclaim what was once a great relationship. I would try to take it slowly and be open-minded. I would not let my ego get in the way of making apologies or accepting suggestions. I promised myself to accept the flow of the relationship with my best effort.
I made the call. Wow, my friend was so excited to hear from me again. We agreed to meet.
It’s been great ever since. Everday is not a party. Everyday is not exciting. In fact my friend and I share some pretty tough days together, but the best part is we go to sleep at night at peace with our relationship and we wake up in the morning with open arms. Now my friend is always there for me, offering a hug, a handshake or simply a smile. I think you know my fiend.
My friend is “TODAY”.
Have you lost touch with “Today”. Have you replaced “Today” with “Yesterday” and “Tomorrow”? Are Yesterday and Tomorrow friends you can count on, or are they simply burdens that weigh you down. Yesterday and Tomorrow are high maintanance “friends”. You can’t change Yesterday. You can’t control Tomorrow. They are stubborn. They are egotistical. I try not to waste my energy on ‘”Yesterday” or “Tomorrow”, instead I try to acccept the things I can’t change or control. I suggest we all can learn from yesterday and prepare for tomorrow by accepting the flow of today with our best effort.
I am so happy that “Today” is in my life again. Thank God It’s Today.
Experience a personal pause.